Who would star in Cleopatra, Monopoly and Rainbow Riches films?
It's finally happening. Battleship, one of the most popular titles in gaming history, is setting sail for Hollywood. Universal has set a firm release date of July 1 2011 for the film version and handed directing duties to none other than Peter Berg, whose previous credits include Hancock and The Kingdom.
This has sparked feverish speculation about who else will come on board. Could Peter Berg call in a few favours - think Will Smith as a know-it-all navy officer, Jason Bateman as a slippery sub captain and Jamie Foxx as a charismatic commander?
Here at Kerching, this has got us thinking. Battleship aside, what stars would we love to front films inspired by our online slots catalogue?
Hollywood belles would no doubt fight tooth and nail to play Cleopatra, the legendary Egyptian queen. But could the likes of Angelina Jolie or Catherine Zeta-Jones really follow in the footsteps of Elizabeth Taylor? No, any Cleopatra needs to understand what it means to have every last detail of your love life pored over. She needs to be one of the most talked about women of her time. She needs to be loved and loathed in equal measure. Who better, then, than Britney Spears? And as a bonus, the former Crossroads actress has a proven track record with snakes - remember that MTV performance?
And there can be little argument who gets star billing in Monopoly: The Movie. For the part of Rich Uncle Pennybags, aka Mr Monopoly, you need an actor with a degree of class, endless cash and a huge moustache. In other words, There Will Be Blood star Daniel Day Lewis.
Finally, the Rainbow Riches leprechaun is a role to die for. There are plenty of A-list Irishmen in Hollywood at the moment and they could all bring something special to the table. Pierce Brosnan could supply the suave sophistication of James Bond, but alas he has jet-black hair and lacks a beard. Liam Neeson scores highly in the follicle stakes, but at 6' 4" he is way too tall. Colin Farrell has also nailed the necessary facial hair and brings the gravitas of Alexander the Great, but isn't he just a bit too good-looking?
For our money, there's only one Irishman who fits the bill - Kenneth Branagh. He's got the beard. He's got the stature at 5' 9". And he's got experience with the biggest roles in history - Hamlet, Iago, Dr Frankenstein and Franklin D Roosevelt. Surely the Rainbow Riches leprechaun is the logical next step?
Posted by Dan at 09:30 AM
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